痞太郎用箋

酒醉的動物 Animals Getting Drunk

這是法國的動物紀錄片，非洲有一種果樹，結的果實含有很高的酒精，動物吃了會怎樣？大家自己看吧。

Indian goes to an Australian grocery store

An Indian goes to Australia and goes to Woolworths (a grocery store in Australia ). He finds cat food at special prices. He picks a dozen cans of cat food and goes to check out.

The Manager gets suspicious. He thinks that this guy cannot have a cat and will probably feed cat food to his kids. He asks the Indian to show him his cat before he could let him have cat food. The Indian goes home and returns with a cat and gets to buy the cat food.

Next week the Indian finds dog food at special prices. He picks a dozen cans of dog food and goes to check out. The Manager again gets

suspicious. He thinks that this guy has a cat but he cannot have a dog and he will probably feed dog-food to his kids. He asks the Indian to bring and show him the dog before he can let him have dog food.The Sardar goes home and returns with a dog. He gets to buy the dog food.

Next week the Indian comes to Woolworths with a bag. He asks the manager to put his hand in the bag. The Manager puts his hand in the bag, feels some thing slimy and immediately takes it out. He shouts at the Indian, What the F*** is this?

Is this shit you idiot?

The Indian calmly replies, Yes, and I want to buy toilet paper.

上帝失手

四十出頭的莉莉心臟病突發，被送往醫院急救。

病情十分糟糕，莉莉感覺自己幾乎都已經死了。

搶救中，莉莉突然聽見了上帝的聲音：

不，妳不會死的，妳還可以活45年6個月，鼓起勇氣活下去！

當然，結果是莉莉奇蹟般地被救活了。

身體復原後，莉莉想到自己還能活40多年，便沒有急著出院，先是墊鼻子，接著是補唇，然後是豐胸，最後是抽脂，一古腦兒連續做了4個美容手術。

然後又叫了專業美髮師上門服務，改換了髮色、做了個新潮髮型，整個人看起來年輕了十幾歲。

當最後一個整形手術完成後，莉莉便高高興興地辦理了出院手續，沒想到在門口卻被一輛急速駛入的救護車撞死了。

到了天堂後，莉莉生氣地質問上帝：

既然你說過我還可以活45年，那麼你就不應該食言啊！

上帝尷尬地聳了聳肩，答道：

真是對不起，剛剛我認不出是妳...